"Every Second To Survive"

No amount of joy can cure me
I've finally reached my end
I'm too tired to try to fight it
And too alert to pretend
When every hill leads to a valley
I'm just slipping out and in
There's no way to enjoy the heights
When you know you'll fall again

O, how I have fallen
I don't want to be alive
You say the only way to be awake
Is to die
But I've tried every angle
With my heart and with my mind
But still I'm empty handed
No matter what I try

Grace can sure forgive me
But it can't erase the past
And it comes to take a bite of me
It's come to take my last
And everyone's a hypocrite
But no one seems to see
While the ones who catch a glimpse of it
Never caught a glimpse of me

O, how I have fallen
I don't want to be alive
You say the only way to be awake
Is to die
But I've tried every angle
With my heart and with my mind
But still I'm empty handed
No matter what I try

The places, that you've taken me
All the days of light and awakening
I can't seem to taste the memory
While I'm here in the darkest cave
Feeling lost, double-crossed, depraved
And not an honest line to cast for me

Friend and foe all look the same
Yeah, no one on my side
If love is really what you say it is
Then why does it turn out a lie
I come so close to safe haven
Only then to realize
Every thing is tainted
Every second to survive